Losing You
by tattoobaby420
Summary: AU FIC: In a world that's overrun by the dead, how will Jean say goodbye to the one person that's always supported him? The one person that always loved him? This world doesn't offer mercy to anyone and it's especially cruel to those who don't deserve to suffer. JeanXMarco oneshot. Might turn this one shot into an alternate ending for a ongoing fic.


Hey everyone! This is a VERY sad oneshot I decided I had to write, since I love MarcoXJean and I love zombies. This is dedicated to my lovely cousin, ManipleManga. I know she'll ball when she reads it! Anyway I hope you like it. I do not own this series, obviously. Please don't cry too much. Oh, please R&R so I know whether or not I should think about making this an alternate ending and just making an ongoing fic out of this. :) Enjoy!

**Losing You**

Jean fidgeted on his horse, Red. They had been riding for hours and still hadn't found anywhere safe enough to set up camp and rest. The world was a cruel empty place now, you never knew when you would draw your last breath. The shaggy blonde pulled the binoculars up to peer through them, noticing a band of walkers several hundred feet ahead of them. He cursed under his breath before dropping them back around his neck. He turned to face his partner, Marco who was riding behind him.

"Hey we've got trouble up ahead. I think we should try to force our way through this one. It doesn't look like they're too agile." He looked down at his hands and tightened his grip on the reins, knowing that if they didn't find somewhere to rest soon, it would get dark.

"Jean, are you sure? Last time we did that, we lost..." Marco was only trying to look out for Jean. He cared about him more than Jean understood, they had an unspoken relationship that Jean always tried to deny to himself. In a world where the dead come back to life and try to eat anyone they can get their hands on, it's hard to cozy up to anyone. It had only been a year since the world went to shit and only about fifteen percent of the world's population was left. Times were grim and if you didn't make the right choice every time, you could end up getting your friends or yourself killed.

"I get it, I'm well aware that we lost the rest of our group. This time is different though. Got it?" Jean retorted back at the boy with freckles.

"I just worry, you haven't been the same since that happened. I don't want you to get ahead of yourself. Please just slow down." Marco was pleading now. He cared deeply for Jean and he told him all the time. Whenever he confessed his feelings, Jean would simply ignore him or tell him that he was confused and just said that because there weren't any girls around. Marco was in love with the cocky bull headed idiot. He wanted to find somewhere safe where they didn't have to run anymore.

"Just chill, Marco. We're coming up on them now so stay sharp. Hold on tight!" He yelled before kicking his horse into a dead run. There were about thirty walkers who were acting very lethargic from lack of nourishment. It was foolish to go head on into battle most of the time but these ones seemed to be dormant. Unsheathing his sword, Jean swung through the crowd, disconnecting as many heads from their owner's spines as he could so that Marco had a clear path to get through. He felt obligated to watch over his partner, he didn't exactly understand why but he knew he had to. Everything he did came down to protecting Marco. Things were going smoothly, well even.

Jean neared the end of the crowd when he heard Marco's horse let out a distressed shriek. He stopped his horse and turned around to see Marco's horse tumble to the ground and send it's rider to the dust to become swarmed by a couple strays that were left behind. Kicking the horse as hard as he could, Jean returned to his fallen comrade and swiftly dismounted, pulling walkers away from Marco. He looked at his partner quickly to see him grab his neck and moan in pain. A walker grabbed onto Jean's arm and startled him back into fight mode. He swung his sword at the walker's head, slicing right through it's mouth. Another walker approached and he shoved the sword through it's jaw and up into the skull, twisting before pulling it back out. The sight was ghastly and bloody, Jean was in a killing rage. Any zombie that dare approached them was quickly eliminated. The last one that was left was subject to Jean slicing it just under the knees, crippling it before slicing it at the neck. When they were all dead, Jean fell to the ground beside his friend, exhausted.

"Marco, what happened? Are you OK?" Jean's hands were shaking, he took a few long drawn out breaths as an attempt to calm himself down. He then glanced at his friend's horse which clearly had a broken leg. It was moaning in pain and out of pity, Jean pulled his revolver out of the holster and held it flesh against the horses skull and pulled the trigger. There was a dead silence before Jean returned to Marco.

"Come on, you can ride on the back of Red with me. We should get going, the gun shot will alert more. I don't think I have the strength to do that again." He held his hand out to help pull his friend up.

"Jean, I can't." Marco was staring at the ground, in shame.

"What are you saying, come one. I know you've been killing to get close to me." Jean smirked slightly, trying to lighten the mood. His smile immediately faded as his friend pulled his collar down to reveal a bloody wound with clear teeth marks. The wound was already starting to turn blue and purple.

"No..Marco...no. This isn't happening. It's not true. I refuse to believe it!" He fell to the ground at his friend's feet, slamming his fist into the dirt repeatedly. Marco put his free hand on Jean's shoulder and pulled him to his feet. Despite all odds, Marco forced a smile. He was always able to remain calm, even in the worst situations.

"Stand up, it makes me sad when you cry. Please stop. It'll be ok, Jean."

"No it won't! It won't be ok unless you stay here! With me! I don't want to be alone. I can't be without you!" Marco pulled his friend in for a hug before wincing in pain and falling against him. His friend's fragile condition brought Jean back to his senses. He wiped the tears from his eyes and forced a straight face. Maybe a reaction like that would have been acceptable in the past but not anymore. Not in this cruel fucked up world.

"Marco, come on, I refuse to leave you here. Just come with me, please. We need to leave. And I'm not going without you."

"Ok, but you have to promise to shoot me when I turn. I don't want to be one of those things. I don't want to hurt you..." His voice was shallow and pained. Jean helped him climb onto the horse before climbing up as well.

"Hold onto me, Marco. Don't let go. C'mon Red, let's go." He nudged the horse into a slow walk and continued down the trail they were on. A lone tear slide down Jean's cheek. If it hadn't been for his tremendous impatience, Marco would still be safe. He wouldn't be losing his only friend. Marco's arms were firmly wrapped around Jean's waist and his head leaning against his back. Marco could feel the poison flowing into his body and he suspected he didn't have much time left. The pulsing of the wound made it hard for him to focus on anything other than his impending doom.

"Are you still alive back there...Marco..." Jean's words were cold yet sincere. He didn't know how to act any other way and Marco knew this. Marco knew exactly how much pain Jean was in right now and despite his condition was still worried about his friend more than himself.

"Yes, but I don't have much longer. I can feel it, it's getting worse. Please keep your end of the promise when the time comes. You have to end this. Ok, Jean?" He coughed in pain and squeezed Jean even tighter.

"I know, no need to keep reminding me. Don't make this any harder."

"Did you think it would end this way for me? I always saw myself making it to the end with you. But maybe this is for the best. I know that you could never feel the same way about me as I do for you. You're too proud, a loner. You're just so imperfectly sublime." Marco was smiling again, despite his pain.

"I didn't want it to end this way, I don't want to lose you Marco. You don't understand. You just don't get it."

"You take care of yourself ok? Please break off of this reckless streak you've been on. I don't want you to end up like this. I want you to make it to the capital, to the safe zone. It's all I wish for. My dying wish. I love you, Jean."

"I know, Marco. You've told me. Look, I'm not very good with these kinds of situations. I don't know what to say. Just don't give up on me yet." Marco started to get dizzy, leaning slightly to the left. Jean used his power to pull him back up. There was a faint repetitive thud coming from behind them. "Do you hear that, Marco?" When he didn't get a response, he turned around to see a very clammy Marco resting against his back. He shook him awake and once he saw that his eyes weren't bloodshot and the purple veins hadn't extended any further up his neck, he relaxed. "What the hell is that noise?"

He turned to look behind them and just as he did, a group of people rode up behind them on horses. It appeared as though they were being followed or running away from something.  
>"Kid, if you two value your lives you need to pick up the pace and follow me." The stranger was on a white horse, he was a very handsome blonde man, Marco would be loving this if he were conscious. Everyone in his posse looked tough.<p>

There was no time for people watching though, Jean pushed Red into a gallop, holding the reins in one hand and firmly grasping Marco's hands that lay on his stomach with his other hand. He followed the stranger's in a dead gallop, they encountered a couple stray walkers but no large groups that slowed them down. Any walkers along the path were quickly and accurately taken out by the group's leader, Erwin. Behind Erwin, was a petite man with black hair and a generally uninterested expression. He was on a black horse and he seemed to be the village asshole. There were three more people behind him, A teenage boy with blonde hair and feminine features, a brunette boy that seemed very nervous, and lastly a beautiful Asian girl. They were a quiet group, none of them spoke until we had reached a fence and the girl whipped off her horse and pulled the gate shut behind us. Mounting again she looked nervously at Marco before riding up beside her commander. The blonde leader led the group to a large camp that had four large tents and a fire ring. The leader dismounted his horse and tied it up. The others followed his example. Jean rode his horse closer to the group out of curiosity. At this moment, Marco's grip around Jean loosened to the point of where his immobile body crashed to the ground. In a panic, Jean slid to the ground and knelt beside Marco. He wrapped his arms around Marco's neck and pulled his head onto his lap.

"Come on, get up, I don't know what to think of these people...Please, you were always the good judge of character." The blonde approached us now. He extended his hand to Jean.

" My name is Erwin. This is my group, Levi, Eren, Mikasa, and Armin. What's wrong with your friend? Is he bitten?" He eyed the pair carefully, his hand never leaving his holstered pistol.

"I'm Jean, and this is...this is Marco. He was bit. Is there anything I can do. I don't want to lose him. I don't know if I can lose him..."

"There's only one thing that will help, A bullet to the head." The short man, Levi said coldly, his eyes showed his disinterest in the situation. It was no wonder that he had survived up until this point. He didn't seem to worry about a thing. An ideal attitude. Erwin glanced at him before turning back, apathetically. The look in his eye made it seem that he had been in the same situation once.

"I'm afraid he's right. How long has it been?"

"About an hour and a half." Jean said under his breath, so quiet he didn't think anyone could hear him.

"The longest anyone has every made it is two hours, you need to prepare yourself." He held his gun out for Jean to grab. "We'll let you have your privacy. I can take your horse to get some water. Remember, your friend isn't himself after he turns. You have to do it. Come find us when it's done and you're ready to discuss your future. I don't like to see anyone travel alone. They're as good as dead." He took Red's reins and the group left the two in peace.

Jean leaned Marco up in front of him so that he was straddling him from behind. "Marco, can you hear me?" He took a handkerchief out of his pocket to wipe the sweat from his friend's forehead. The only noise the injured man made was a slight moan of pain. This alarmed Jean and caused him to start shaking. "Please don't let me do this alone. Please say something. Anything." Once again, silence filled the air. Jean thought about his future. He had dealt with the loss of the rest of his group- Annie, Connie, Sausha, Christa. It was hard but he got over it because he had Marco. His reason to live was Marco, he lived for the smile that Marco gave him even when he knew he wanted to cry, the comforting affection that seemed to never run out, and the love that he often confessed to Jean no matter how many times he was shot down. He couldn't imagine a world where he couldn't turn to Marco when he needed him. Tears streamed down his face with no sign of ever stopping. If Marco couldn't continue to live with him, life wasn't worth living. He was tired of barely surviving. "Marco, please. Give me a sign."

"Jean...It's over. Just know," Jean lay his head against Marco's shoulder. He could hear the man coughing up blood. It was the most painful thing he'd ever had to witness. "just know, that I love you. And I will never stop." It was time. time to finish this. He begged the heavens for the strength to do what he knew he had to. He lay a kiss on the back of Marco's head and gently settled the cold steel barrel against the spot he had kissed. He shut his eyes and let his finger rest on the trigger. He reached for Marco's hand and tightened his grip on it. He was hypervenhilating and trying to hold the tears back.**_'I could always see myself making it to the end with you'._**  
>"I love you too, Marco. I always have." If Jean could have seen the smile on Marco's face, he would have noticed the peaceful expression that followed it. Marco Bodt was gone. Jean counted before pulling the trigger...1..2..3. Blood and brain matter splattered throughout the grass from the man's head before Jean let his body fall down beside him. Sobbing uncontrollably, he cocked the gun a second time and held the barrel under his chin before closing his eyes.<p>

"Goodbye Marco." A second gunshot rang throughout the valley. _I'm sorry I couldn't fulfill your wish, Marco. Because losing you was never something I could endure._


End file.
